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Welcome back to Vox in a Minute. Today: do kids really need a best friend?
Parents often worry that without a single, special pal, their child will miss out. But research suggests it’s not that simple. A study published in Child Development found that “kids who identified a best friend at ages ten to twelve reported lower levels of loneliness,” yet it also showed that “even children without a single closest pal benefit socially from multiple, supportive friendships.” Rather than a lone bestie, what matters most is the quality of those peer connections.
Experts argue that friendship networks shift as kids grow. In early elementary school, children may latch onto one playmate. By middle school, they tend to form wider circles—texting, gaming, hanging out in small groups. That diversity of friends can foster adaptability, empathy, and resilience.
So should parents step in if their child lacks a “best friend”? Vox psychologist Claire D. warns: “Pressuring a child to choose one confidant can backfire.” Instead, encourage inclusive play, shared hobbies, and kindness. After all, what really helps a child thrive is feeling connected—whether to one close friend or many.
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